Well... as hard as it was to try and stay awake all day at work yesterday and encourage/motivate myself to go to judo it was the best thing for me. I woke up and felt great
Judo makes me feel so happy and the people there are like a one big loving family. It is my blood. I have been doing judo on and off since I was six years old.
I also think judo is the cause behind my obsession with my weight and the history behind yo yo dieting. When you compete in judo you compete in weight categories. So from the age of 14 I have been dieting to be a certain weight. People may say why can't you just maintain it. But it is impossible. I use to always naturally sit between the two weight categories and then the more dieting I did the harder it was to lose and the more I gained to the point where I started crash dieting. We use to all go out for a big eat fest after a competition.
I hate saunas now. I lost 8 kilos in 5 days once from eating nothing, drinking nothing and sitting in a sauna with an old judo suit, garbage bags, baby oil and a shower cap to sweat it out.
Jockeys do it, boxers do it, it is just done.
I now struggle to maintain a balance. Binge eating was a routine part of my life.
I struggle so hard with diet.
Okay I better get some work done.
Skinny thoughts...
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